ARTS FUNDING THREATENED... With Natividad on the verge of handing out 64 pink slips and county sheriffs facing a 20-person hit, it seems a bit Marie Antoinette-ish to gripe about the Supes cutting funds for county arts programs during their big Budget Bash earlier this week. But, in the immortal words of Nicole Kidman, art is important. Cultural Council exec David Cloutier points out that not only has county arts funding "never been in a more perilous position," but the way our Supes have constructed the funding machinations, dollars for the arts are being pitted against dollars for tourism. There oughta be a law, Cloutier storms. (There is, but it ain't a good law.) Local arts and tourism interests are closely linked, he adds, and their proponents shouldn't have to draw knives on each other. Stay tuned for more.

GIVE BACK THOSE SHELLS...What kind of selfish, ignorant lowlife would steal a collection of 48 carved abalone shells from the Whaler's Cabin at Pt. Lobos? The shells, carved by New England whaler Charles Durgin in the 1870s, are a priceless piece of California history, used by park docents to teach schoolchildren about our area's whaling past. Give 'em back, or--better yet--turn in the thief and collect a $5,000 reward, no questions asked. Call Earl Collison at 620-1629.

BOX SEATS FOR JAZZ FEST...Ever wonder who are the lucky stiffs who score the best seats to the Monterey Jazz Festival, time after time? This year, it could be you. On June 15, an eight-seat Front Box for the Sept. 19-21 festival goes on the auction block, with all proceeds donated to the festival jazz education fund. These box seats are right in front of the stage! Can't get any closer! Plus you get eight tickets to the swank VIP Artist Bar! The auction takes place on ebay, and will close June 25. Call the festival box office at 925-275-9255 or visit www.montereyjazzfestival.org for more information.

CALL FOR POETRY...P.G. poet-in-residence Ryan Masters has yet another project up his bardic sleeve: an anthology of Monterey Bay poetry, to be published in the spring of 2004 by the Monterey Bay Poetry Press. If you are a poet who lives or has ever lived in what might reasonably be called the Monterey Bay area, please submit one to five of your best poems to Ryan at 140 18th St., Pacific Grove 93950, or to ryan@montereybaypoetry.com.