IT AIN’T OVER… If this writer thing doesn’t work out for Squid, Squid is going to consider pursuing a career in the fortune telling field. It’s got that air of mystery to it that Squid finds so attractive. Plus, Squid’s always been so self-conscious about this pointy-head—why not cover it up with an exotic-looking headscarf? The accessories are a definite plus. Then there’s the obvious reason to become a seer: Squid’s so damn good at predicting the future.

Take Rancho San Juan, for example, narrowly approved by County Supervisors last week. For weeks, months, years, even (okay, maybe years is a bit of a stretch), Squid has been predicting that the Planning Commission would give the massive development a thumbs down, but that the Supes would ignore their advisory panel and would approve the project by a 3-2 vote, with Supervisors Edith Johnsen, Butch Lindley, and Fernando Armenta voting yes on the proposal to build 4,000 homes between Salinas and Prunedale, and Supervisors Dave Potter and Lou Calcagno voting no. Squid also predicted that Calcagno’s no would be a hesitant no—he’s worried that come election time, developer Moe Nobari, usually a very generous contributor to Calcagno’s campaigns, might not be in such a giving mood. Calcagno’s smart, though, and he also knows that were he to support the 2,600-acre development, he wouldn’t see a third term. Calcagno’s North County constituents are some of the most vocal opponents of Rancho San Juan. Plus, with three yes votes in the bag, Calcagno could vote against the project and know that it would still ultimately be approved.

Squid’s crystal ball proved correct on all of the above. Now, back to tentacle reading. What’s that Squid sees? A big, fat raise in Squid’s future?

IF THE PANT FITS… “Work. What a day. Meetings all morning then off to a photo shoot. Forget lunch. I’m looking forward to dinner. Not even time to change. I’m wearing the right pants, though. Sexy, slim fit, flare leg…I look hot. Where would I be without them?”

Note: That wasn’t Squid—that was Squid’s new pants talking. Squid just picked up the latest release of the Editor Pant from Express at the Del Monte Shopping Center, and couldn’t help but admire the copy on the hangtag. Not only are the black pinstriped pants in Premiere fabric slimming, but also they so expertly sum up Squid’s jet-setting lifestyle at the Weekly. Although, it would probably be more appropriate if Squid switched to Express’ Correspondent Pant. Squid didn’t spot a hangtag on that one, but wonders if the correspondent has time for lunch? Probably with an interesting interview subject—maybe Jennifer Aniston—while Squid’s poor editor works the photo shoot.

As Squid was heading to the counter, an overly bright color combination caught Squid’s eye. The newly released Publicist Pant comes with an obnoxiously patterned waistband that’s—dare Squid say it—jarring and almost clashing. Harsh, and grating even. The Express Design Studio says it took nearly 1,000 hours to design the Editor Pant. Squid sees that just as much care went into matching the Publicist Pant to its intended recipient.