MISPLACED VIGILANCE… Squid needs new boots. But the Squidmobile doesn’t.

The SALINAS POLICE DEPARTMENT is handing out the orange boots that get locked onto a car’s wheels when it has racked up too many tickets. And the PD is having way too much fun with them in OLDTOWN.

It was bad enough when—after the parking structure opened—parking enforcement spiked. Cars on Main were being ticketed left and right for inching a moment beyond their one-hour parking limit.

It wouldn’t normally be such a big deal to Squid, but Oldtown’s in a tough spot. There are thousands of square feet available for rent. And rumors abound that even popular spots like HULLABALLOO are struggling (though that months-old gossip is a bit tired).

Business owners are complaining to Squid that their customers are fed up. The parking structure isn’t always a convenient—particularly on a dark night. The closer free lots are poorly lit and accessible only through walkways that are so dark, you couldn’t even ID your attacker.

There just seem to be bigger fish to fry than parking. What the city doesn’t collect in fines, it’d make up for in sales tax. There’s just no downside to helping Oldtown thrive by making it a convenient place to go, park and shop.

CAN’T DRIVE 45… So let’s get this straight: CALTRANS and the CALIFORNIA HIGHWAY PATROL are going to host an informational meeting Monday night at NORTH MONTEREY COUNTY HIGH SCHOOL about whether or not the speed limit on Highways 1 and 101 should be upped to comport with state law? Ah yes, Caltrans and CHP—both impartial third parties on the issue. Oh, wait. Both of those agencies make serious bank off of speeding tickets on those roads. Sounds like sending the toy store exec out to research whether or not Christmas should be banned.

Squid’s not oblivious to the fact that 101 through Prunedale and Highway 1 near Moss Landing are both risky stretches of road. But seriously. With folks cruisin’ through at 70 on an average day, it’s the guy who’s going 45 who’s at risk. Squid’s OK with a happy medium of raising the speed limit to a more reasonable rate.

In any case, Squid’s excited about slithering up to the meeting. Squid figures there’ll be a lot about danger, death, road conditions, fuel economy, propaganda—wait, did Squid say propaganda? Nah.

Squid thinks these disinterested third parties holding the soirée should take a vote. Now that’d be fun to watch. Squid will even write up the ballot: Should the holiday party fund for the CHP and Caltrans be abolished by raising the speed limits to reflect drivers’ habits?

Squid votes yes.