Brian Regan knows a cherry gig when he sees one.

“I don’t know who’s writing books for babies,” he says during his recent Comedy Central special, “Brian Regan: Standing Up,” “but I want a piece of that financial pie.

“I put my daughter on my lap and read to her,” he continues, simulating the turn of an oversized page. “The…clock (turn). The…big…clock (another big turn). Tick…tock (turn). The end.” Then a final turn to the back of the book: “Twelve bucks.”

Of course, the real punch line here is that Regan already has the perfect job. He arrives in Monterey Sunday night as part of an extensive national tour and will perform at the Golden State Theatre.

The reason the comedy game fits him so well is pretty funny in and of itself.

“This is going to sound ridiculous,” he told the Weekly by phone from his home in Las Vegas. “But I can’t have a job I have to wake up for. I can’t do it. I can’t wake up and live in this world the way other people do.”

He recognized a job that would accommodate habits that had him missing football practice and led his friends to nickname him Rip Van Winkle. “A comedian performed at our college,” he says. “The show started at 8pm. I was like, ‘Wow.’ I was more intrigued with the hours: ‘Starting work at 8? I can do that.’ ”

Predictably, it didn’t come that easy – “Yeah, I didn’t realize all the work,” he concedes – but despite the trials that bottomed out with a gig when he could literally hear the crickets outside (“I said I could hear them and got the only laugh of the night,” he recalls) Regan says “he has never regretted” his career choice.

The love of his job shows in his willingness to log 25 years to rise from fleeting appearances on Showtime and “The Pat Sajak Show” in the late ’80s and early ’90s to firmly establish himself as a top touring act, Letterman Show staple, and standup-special star. In fact, he’ll film his second-straight Comedy Central one-hour show in Denver on May 17.

“Monterey is pretty much gonna be a fine-tuned version of what the special will be,” he says. “The first 45 minutes will be it: bang, bang, bang.”

Regan says he is able to keep his material field fresh by harvesting everyday experience for observations that grow into wonderful bits, à la Jerry Seinfeld, one of the comedians he ranks as an all-time great (Richard Pryor, George Carlin and an “underrated” Steve Martin land near the top, too).

“I’ve learned that I can’t sit down at a blank piece of paper,” he says. “I live my life, read, watch TV, spend time with my family, go to the store, do what I would normally do, and things just kind of pop out at you – ‘Maybe that’ll be a bit’ – then I’ll sit down and write it.”

Regan gleaned a particularly nutritious nugget for his last special simply prowling the greeting card aisle.

“They have a whole section called ‘Encouragement,’ ” he says. “I like to send those to people who are not about to do anything – just keep sending them follow-ups and confusing them. ‘You can do it!’ ‘Do what?’

“…or go pick someone random out of the phone book, send them 100 ‘Just Because’ cards. They can’t even ask you why you did it.”

His greeting-card observations even furnished another job possibility.

“They have a whole section called ‘Blank Inside,’ he says, pretending to write a card. “ ‘Sorry you’re feeling so blank inside. Sometimes I feel like that sometimes myself.’

“What a scam. The guy who makes those must wake up laughing. ‘What do you do again?’ ‘Heh heh heh. I sell “Blank Inside” cards. Picture of a tree, nothin’ on the inside, no little limerick, no nothing. They’re buying a crease.’ ”

Of course, these days Brian Regan isn’t really looking for work.

BRIAN REGAN performs at 7pm Sunday, May 4, at Golden State Theatre, 417 Alvarado St., Monterey. $39.50. 372-4555 or goldenstatetheatre.net.