CHOP SHOP… Squid woke up the other day reciting one of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s most memorable quotes: “Get to tha choppa!” from Predator. Squid understands Arnie’s ardor – a skull-collecting, chameleon-like alien was hunting his squad. Sheriff Mike Kanalakis’ push for the county to buy a helicopter doesn’t carry the same punch, but Kanalakis sure is touchy about his pet chopper. As first reported in the Weekly, the Sheriff’s Office suspended Kanalakis’ political rival, Cmdr. Fred Garcia, after he jumped on the sheriff for pursuing bells and whistles while neglecting a backlog of police work, sending a scathing letter to the supes and media outlets. On Oct. 15, Kanalakis took his gun away, pending an internal investigation. Garcia fired back: “In 29 years of service to the Sheriff’s Department, I had never been the subject of an internal investigation or a citizen complaint. Since announcing my candidacy in July, I have become the subject of two internal investigations. I believe the public can judge the record.” Garcia adds that Sheriff’s Office employees “work under a cloud of fear and intimidation.” And apparently, Kanalakis already promoted Ken Anderson to Garcia’s post as homeland security commander. Squid hopes voters take notice and question whether they want a bully running this county. If only Kanalakis had a guttural Austrian accent to say: “Get off my choppa!”

G IS FOR GRIMY… Carmel Valley Road is one of Squid’s all-time prettiest drives. But Squid noticed a lot of clutter on the side of the road during a recent grape-stomping adventure on a lovely autumn afternoon. “No City! Keep Our Valley Rural!” the red No on G signs shouted. The green Yes on G signs – fewer and farther between – retorted: “Don’t Yield to Developers.” “Keep Carmel Valley Rural.” As Nov. 3 draws near, Squid’s seeing more muck flying from both camps. A pro-G developer and Carmel Valley resident wants to make a stink of the Herald’s assignment of reporter Laith Agha to the Measure G debate, saying he’s conflicted because his dad, developer Nader Agha, owns CV land that’s peppered with No on G signage. Another pro-G tipster is obsessing over campaign finance information filed a few days late. Anti-G folks, meanwhile, are calling G supporters May Waldroup and Dave Potter “big-time developers,” which is about as exaggerated as their claim that an incorporated Carmel Valley would soon look like Los Angeles. Squid’s privy to townhood, Squidself, as the Weekly’s endorsement this week shows. But in the last election stretch, even Squid hopes to refrain from spraying ink up the wrong arses. Measure G is a debate about self-determination, not a mud-wrestling event.