SLICK LIKE OIL… Squid’s feelings are not easily hurt, but Squid still abides by basic party etiquette. That’s why Squid is tired of the slippery runaround Chevron is handing a Weekly colleague who was invited – and then uninvited – on a tour of some of its South County oil wells. 


When an aide to County Supervisor Jane Parker broke the news to Squid’s compatriot that an invitation to join community activists and county supes on the upcoming tour had been revoked, the dodginess began. Parker’s aide blamed Simon Salinas; his aide pointed at Ventana Wilderness and Land Trust Director Steve Craig for dragging the whole tour into the ground. 


But tour organizer, Salinas-based planning consultant Maureen Wruck (whose clients include Chevron), says the oil giant’s at fault. Chevron thought having elected officials and press on the same tour “was mixing apples and oranges,” says Wruck. Maybe true, but Squid likes mixed fruit salads just fine. 


What doesn’t mix well are oil and water. That’s why Squid swims deep, to avoid shenanigans like this one. 


SPEAKING OF JANE… Parker suffered two blows in a row, the first Jan. 11 when her fellow supes declined to rubber-stamp Janet Brennan as Parker’s nomination to the Planning Commission, and the second Jan. 25, when supes Salinas, Lou Calcagno and Fernando Armenta said that after some consideration (and complaint from residents of Parker’s 4th District) they didn’t want the very qualified but 5th District-residing Brennan at all. Now Parker is going back to the drawing board and seeking nominations for a candidate from her district. Squid hopes someone steps up to the plate. It would be mighty strange to create a ruckus without offering an alternative.


THE PAKISTANI MAN CAN… The Monterey County Health Department often sends Squid warning notices of various dangers that Squid may (or not) encounter in life. Back in December it passed along info on a recall of cooked smoked turkey breast possibly tainted with listeria monocytogenes – which sounds brutal, though no one was reported ill. Sometimes it’s about high sewage content in the ocean… thanks for the heads up, but Squid knows when that’s the problem. The latestwarning: the total recall of all flavors of a candy line imported from Pakistan that were found to contain “higher than acceptable” levels of lead. The name of the candy? Toxic Waste brand Nuclear Sludge. Squid’s not laughing, really. That’s the hiccups.